Saturday, 24 June 2017

part 20 : Beetein_Lamhe

PART - 20

"nurse.. nurse.." the doc asked lill loudly examining the ECG machine.. her heartbeat is going slow to slower..

"yes doctor??" nurse asked at once nd got the order from the doctor at the very nxt moment..

"electric shock.. be fast.." the doc said quickly examining her almost inaudible heartbeat nd pulse rate..

Nurse nodded quickly nd got busy to follow the necessities..


"riddhima.. jaan??"
armaan tried once more to get any response from her but she juz kpt mum nd kpt on clinging onto him as desperately as before.. she was too afraid to free him from her embrace.. if she breaks the hug, he'll flee away.. nd this thought juz turning her insane.. so, she juz kpt on holding him securely in her arms, nesting her head in the crook of his shoulder, inhaling his fragrance deeply, chanting nd re-chanting in her brain dat he's dere.. he's dere against her.. he hasn't leave her.. yess!! he's still dere wth her.. she can feel him..

At first armaan didn't wriggled to break d hug..nd let her stay like dat as long as she like but now she's extending the time too much.. he heard wat doctors say.. her pulse rate is dropping nd so is her heart beat.. if she doesn't go bck now, it'll be too late to return to her body.. he can't kpt on holding her soul against him anymore.. although he,himself doesn't want her to let go but he has to do it.. spcly for their princess.. nd so, armaan tried hard to bring riddhima bck to her senses by calling her again..

But as usual riddhima is lost in her own world.. she didn't stir or utter a single whisper.. she juz kpt on saying in her brain dat he's still wth her.. nd she won't leave him no matter wat.. but her chain of chants broke wen suddenly she felt herself being detangled from him wth harsh pull.. she felt horrified nd looked at the source at once too anxiously as if her life has snatched away from her body nd in deed it was her life wat was separated from her. thn. her armaan, her life.. both are identical to her.. but d nxt moment she felt herself dumbfounded seeing it her armaan only who detangled her from him.. she became highly confused..

"armaan??" she asked meekly not believing dat he actually separated her from him..!!

"go back riddhima.." his voice was as steady as ice.. his eyes were fixed at distant voidity.. he nvr shifted his gaze on her.. as he knws if he does it, it'll be d biggest mistake now.. his mind will lose to his heart nd he won't be able to allow her to go.. godd!! he badly insanely desperately needs her by his side..

"no.." she was adamant juz like before..

"u hve to.." armaan said again..lill helplessly this time.. "oh god riddhima..plz agree wth me jaan.. dnt mke it this difficult.. dnt mke me weak.. plz jaan.." armaan hoped in his heart..

"I won't.." riddhima's voice was too firm..

never till now armaan felt her voice this much of confident.. nd automatically his gaze landed on his lady who was standing straight wth utmost confidence fixing her gaze on his eyes only.. he felt strong urge to go nd crush her in between his arms but he controlled.. he fisted his palms as tightly as possible..  "u've to be strong armaan.. u've to be.." he kpt on saying in his mind while showering endless love upon her through his heavenly soft admiring gaze.. goshh!! he loves her too muchh.. how can he send her bck wen she too wants to stay.. he felt vulnerable.. he sighed nd thn finally concluded to disclose the bitter incident that happened aftr riddhima's horrible nervous breakdown.. 'yess.. only this can chnge her decision..' armaan thought again..nd strted..

Ar : "princess ke liye bhi nhi??" his voice was calm nd soft like feather..

Ri : "she'll manage armaan.." she replied helplessly.. 'godd!! how mny times she has to say this to him to mke him undrstnd..' riddhima thought looking at him pleadingly..

Ar : "tumhey sach mein lagta hain she'll b able to manage??" there was a hint of mystery in his voice which made riddhima restless.. still she managed to stay calm nd said softly mking him understand..

Ri : "samrat hain,na.." she managed a small smile aftr dat.. god knws how she managed to curve her lips into a faint smile but nxt momnt her lips regained its previous position getting no response frm his side..

Ar : "haan samrat hain but don't u knw wohh kitna door hain?? (pause.. riddhima looked at him being all confused).. chah ke bhi rahul nd muskaan ussey contact nhi kar paa rahe hain, riddhima.. (pause..her restlessness came bck immediately..).. jabki uski patni ki abhi operation chal raha hain aur uskey sath koi nhi hain.. na uski dada aur na hi uski mumma.."
his voice trembled..

Ri : "what' do.. u.. mean?? Arri ka operation?? abhi?? par Kyun?? Uski delivery mein abhi bhi two weeks hain,na.. fir abhi kaisey??"
Riddhima's voice chocked wth ds new revelation.. she felt another harsh blow nd trembled in fear.. no!! arri ko kuch nhi ho sakta.. she looked at armaan pleadingly for clarifying further..

"jab ambulance aya nd tumhey neechey laya jaa raha tha, toh princess bhi zabardasti ane ki koshish kar rahi thi.. muskaan nd rahul ke sath but.." armaan paused nd looked at riddhima hesitantly.. should he tell her?? hasn't she fced enuf alrdy??

"but what??" riddhima demanded..

"but ' but she was too panicked for u riddhima.. aur isi liye tensn mein jab woh seedi (stairs) se utar ne ki koshish kar rahi thi toh.."

"no!!" riddhima shouted at once stopping armaan to say anything more..

Armaan closed his eyes.. he was dreading this only.. he cant see her breaking again n again that too on the same day during last a few hours.. but he tried to send her bck wthout revealing it.. didn't he?? he felt pathetic nd helpless.. unwilling to him, two tear streams strtd flowing frm his both closed eyes overflowing his unbearable pain..

"woh slip ho gayee riddhima..princess.. princess slip ho gayee.." armaan whispered wth lots of difficulty.. his voice was chocking remembering the condition of his darling princess wen she,too, was taken to hospital along wth riddhima.. her shrieks.. her pain.. her tears.. nd above all her blood.. all are still fresh in his mind.. god knws how he managed himslf seeing his princess in dat state.. how he cursed his luck for being there but not being able to do anything.. how he craved to go nd hold her hands.. run his own hands ovr her forehead to soothe her.. support her saying..'kuch nhi hoga princess..ur dada is here,na..' ... armaan opened his eyes at once unable to stand by those flashes now but he couldn't able to see riddhima's condition thn as his eyes were too full wth his own tears.. he strted wiping his eyes wth his hands while saying..
"aur abhi princess ki condition bahot kharab hain, riddhima.. kafi blood loss.."

"stop armaan.. plz stop.."

Armaan looked at her at once feeling her vulnerable state nd there she is.. trying hard to kp on standing but failing miserably.. her head is whining making it impossible for her to stnd steadily.. armaan rushed to her quickly to give her support.. she looked at him helplessly.. her face is again pale nd blank..

"I told u na riddhima u've to go back.." riddhima kpt on looking at him hlplessly..

"ar..maan.. (pause).. main.. (pause).." it was too hard to talk now.. her voice was cracked.. throat is dry like desert.. head is paining as if sumone is hitting a hammer against it.. her limbs are again too numb to carry her load.. in short she's back to the moment wen she got dat phone call.. once again she became a lifeless doll.. her whole wrld is destroying in front of her eyes nd she cnt do anything.. she felt too weak nd involuntarily her head bent over armaan's chest for support.. armaan also kpt on holding her against him warmly occasionally patting her head lovingly.. but riddhima didn't hug him back.. raising her own hands felt impossible to her thn.. she stayed like dat putting her whole weight on him.. her head was too occupied to think anything more.. she felt blank.. she juz kpt on blinking in between along wth her shallow irregular breathing..

After some minutes ridhima tried to talk agn.. "armaan??"

"haan riddhima.." he said lovingly still protecting her wthn his arms..

"main chah kar bhi wapas nhi jaa sakti armaan.." she stated d most imp info without dragging the issue..

He looked at her at once..

"I .. I want to go.. I want to be wth arri, armaan.. mujhey pata hain ussey meri zaroorat hain par armaan main chah kar bhi jee nhi payungi tumharey bina.." she said slowly..

"riddhima?? plz jaan aise mat socho.. u cn do it.. i knw u can.." he said trying to shw his confidence but his voice betrayed him badly.. his voice trembled.. godd!! he was dreading this only.. he knws how much connected they are.. nd he alwaz had this hidden fear in his heart if sumthing hppns to him will riddhima able to survive alone?? is he doing ri8 mking her so involved wth him?? but in spite of all these contrary thoughts he nvr was able to stay away frm her.. they were alwaz too dependent on each othr for every big or lill things.. armaan felt guilty for mking riddhima too engrossed within him nd naturally felt himself breaking dwn seeing its consequences.. but he can't.. he simply can't brk dwn in frnt of her dat too at this time of severe crisis.. he controlled once agn..

"meri sanse tumse judi hui hain armaan.. tum nhi hoge toh saans lena bhi mumkin nhi hoga merey liye.. aur yeh tumhey bhi pata hain ki main sach keh rahi hoon.. meri zindegi tumsey suru hoke tumpe hi khtm ho jati hain armaan.. itney saal srf tummey uljhi rahi hoon main.. tumharey alawa kabhi kuch socha hi nhi mainey.. abhi tum chahte ho toh I'm going par koi faida nhi hoga.. it'll result my death only.." riddhima stopped nd tried to look at him but he didn't loose his arms so she strted agn..
"par arri ko meri zarroorat hain aur tum mano ya na mano par i knw ki tumhey bhi meri utni hi zaroorat hain..  par armaan.. aabhi main kya karun?? kaisey sambhalun sab kuch?? aur kissey sambhalun?? Aur ussey bhi imp yeh hain ki khud ko kaisey sambhalun?? Main.. main.." riddhima suddenly strted getting hysteric.. so many questions.. but no answer.. she wanna solve all but there's no way to balance both.. how can she choose between her husband nd her daughter.. how can she conclude wat comes 1st.. wife or mother?? oh godd.. she want dem both.. she truly want to be wth dem both.. but how?? she felt her head thudding to loud as if it'll burst at any moment..

"sshh'" armaan stopped herself thn n there feeling her trembling vigorously against him nd hugged her more warmly enveloping her wthn him, as if wanting her to protect all these mental torture but he,too, knws dat he cnt do dat.. they hve to fce it.. they hve to solve it but is dere actually any solution?? armaan thought..

"aisa kyun ho raha hain armaan?? Sab kuch toh thik tha na.. kuch der pehle bhi hum kitney khush the.. toh fir achanak sab kaisey beekhar gaya armaan?? abhi main kya karun?? Kaisey sambhalun?? Kissey sambhalun?? Oh armaannn.." riddhima felt dizzy..

"riddhima..jaan..bass.." armaan tightened his grip around her kissing her forehead immediately..


"doctor?? Aab kya karenge?? Mrs. Mallik toh respond hi nhi kar rahi??" nurse asked the attendant doctor worriedly...

"I'm afraid that we won't be able to save her.. but still her heart is beating very slwly.. kp her under observation nd if any thing happens do inform me at once.." the doctor suggested..

"yes sir.." nurse agreed nd the doctor left for other duties..


They stayed like dat for sum tym more nd finally after thinking lots armaan suggested.. "if I stay wth u jaan.. tab toh tum manage kar logi na??"


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