Saturday, 23 June 2018

part 23 : Pehchan

From Ridhima ....

"Sometimes in this lifetime,
we meet a special soul,
we drink the cup of Love, 
it tastes like ruby wine,
and you know within your heart,
this meeting was Divine.
I'm not scared to love you,
My heart lit up when your around,
You've given my heart a soundtrack,

I happen to like the sound.
I feel like I can tell you anything,
And you don't judge me for it,
You just look at me with your perfect smile,
And make my heartbeat skip.
Every time I see you,
I want you more and more.
Every time you touch me,
I pinch myself to see if I'm awake.
Every time you look into my eyes,
It's my heart you begin to take.
I love you and this is true.
I love you more than words can ever say,
I love you more when you take my breath way.
I thank God for you everyday. " To Armaan

(thanks Nidha for the wonderful poem)

RECAP: Wide-eyed, in disbelief, he pressed the 'rewind' button repeatedly and heard the most melodious composition of his life- haan….main tumhari hoon Armaan…aur hamesha rahoongi! His heart leapt in somersaults as Riddhima's sweet voice echoed between his ears and the laptop speakers.

Out of nowhere the magical words hit the airwaves, sending his soul into frenzy (courtesy Aria!)

A crimson faced Riddhima ran away from the room, discomfited by her own impulsive act, unable to face Armaan at that moment. Armaan ran after her, paused, facing her back. From behind he could see her chest heave as her tiny frame quivered like a leaf on a breezy afternoon. Her clenched fists and curled toes were proof that he was not hallucinating.

 "Riddhima," his deep, husky voice resonated behind her ears, "rule # 9 of friendship- never hide the truth from your best friend."

"I am not good at following rules Armaan. I have broken all rules in my life- rules of my marriage, and rules of my friendship," with pursed lips, she tried to control her guilt laced tears.

"There are no rules in love because love just follows the heart. Dil par kisi ka bas nahin chalta Riddhima. Don't blame yourself." Gently, he touched her shoulder and took a step forward; his torso brushing against her behind ever so lightly.

"Armaan," squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to step away from him but his firm grip and warm breaths disabled her knees and legs.

"Ek baar phir se kaho Riddhima. I want to hear it again." He whispered against her ear, sending a rush of emotions within her.

"I can't," she hid her face in her palms, "I am sorry Armaan…..I don't know why I said that."

Holding her shoulders, he turned her around, staring at her face buried within her palms. Gently, he parted her palms and cupped her face with his hands, "wo tumhare dil ki awaaz thi Riddhima. I want to hear it again. Do you love me Riddhima?"

It was impossible to look into his eyes and lie; she averted her gaze and replied, "I don't know."

"Does your heart skip a beat each time I am near you?" He came closer.

"May be," she hesitated.

"Do you miss me sorely when I am not with you?"

"May be." She kept her gaze away.

"Jab main udaas hota hoon tho kya tumhara dil bhi udaas ho jaata hai?"


"Kya mujhey khush dekh kar tumhein sab se zyaada khushi milti hai?"

"Ha-an," she nodded gently.

He brushed his finger against her cheek, "jab main choota hoon tho tumhein kaisa mehsoos hota hai?"

Overwhelmed by his proximity and touch, her cheeks burning, she shut her eyes, "I don't know Armaan," she cried out, "I just know that whenever you are near me, I don't need anyone else. I feel lost whenever you are away; my heart cries for you when you are sad; and…and when you touch me, I feel an inexplicable thrill in every ounce of my body which I have never felt before…..aur main kuch nahin jaanti…..I am sorry Armaan, main aur kuch nahin jaanti…..I am sorry……and I don't know why but I have felt this way since the time I met you. Pehle yeh dil sirf tum se milna chaahta tha, dheere dheere tumhara intezaar karne laga, aur phir sirf tumhare paas rehne ki tamanna karne laga. "

Cupping her face again, he bent down and kissed her eyelids softly, "I am not sorry Riddhima. Even I have been guilty of falling in love with you from the first day we met. Bahut chaaha tum se door rehna, lekin dil ko rok nahin saka. I love you Riddhima and I am not sorry about it. Pyaar karna koi jurm nahin hai. It's beyond our control. It was meant to be."

"But I am married Armaan. How can I justify having such thoughts for another man?" She asked, holding his hands next to her face, "I am equally responsible for breaking my marriage. I have been unfaithful too."

"No Riddhima. Unfaithfulness is a symptom of a broken marriage; not the cause. You and Abhimanyu were never meant to be together. It was a mistake." He wiped her tears with his thumbs.

"Isn't marriage supposed to be sacred? God's wish?" She asked, "then why did I let my heart stray?"

"Love is sacred, marriages are contracts. Shaadi, insaan ka banaya hua bandhan hai, pyaar bhagwan ki dua hai," He smiled tearfully at her, "God is giving you a second chance Riddhima. He is helping you rectify the mistake made by our elders. Tumne Abhimanyu se apni marzi se shaadi nahin ki thi, aur na Abhimanyu ne tumse. Shaadi tho tab hoti hai jab dil mil jaayein. Tumhare aur Abhimanyu ke dil tho kabhie mile hi nahin, tho wo shaadi nahin, sirf ek bandhan hai tumhare liye Riddhima. Please don't call that a marriage."

Misty eyed, she looked up at his tearful eyes. The outpour of love and intensity in his eyes besieged her heart; she could not take it any longer and collapsed in his arms, embracing him with passion and craving, letting out her secret, "I love you Armaan. I love you very much. I can't live without you." Armaan pulled her closer and kissed her neck, "phir se kaho Riddhima….I want to hear it again."

"I love you Armaan," her voice muffled against his heart as they held each other snugly. The fine line between friendship and love had been broken forever as he showered her face, neck and ears with kisses. He lifted her chin and stared at her lips, "I am glad I went to Nainital. Aisa lagta hai tumse door rehkar tumhein hamesha ke liye paa liya."

 Beset by the passion in his eyes, she lowered her gaze, parting her lips slightly, "Armaan…your m-music deadline…..wo recording submit karni hai na tumhein?"

"I don't care. I have just received the best award of my life, recording be damned…..I have just heard the most beautiful song of my life…….and I could press the replay button all day.  Opportunities to record for an album would come and go, but if I had not played the song, I would have missed the opportunity of my life time. Thank you Riddhima," he kissed her palms, then each finger individually, moving up to her wrists, weakening her resolve to keep distance from him. His lips had aroused every cell in her body, but she was aware that if he went any further, they would be treading on dangerous grounds.

"Armaan….I have to go now," she pulled her hands away, "and you should also go to the academy."

"Where are you going?"

"I have decided to move out Armaan," she looked away, her wrists still tingling from the lingering effects of his kisses.

"Riddhima? Kya keh rahi ho? We both realize we can't live without each other. Why are you doing this to us?"

"I need to do it- for us," she receded from his arms.

"I don't understand Riddhima." He was heartbroken.

"Tumhein hamesha ke liya paana chaahti hoon Armaan, lekin uske liye pehle tumhein khona padhega. Hamara pyaar sachcha hai, uspar koi daag nahin aana chaahiye. I don't want to tarnish the sanctity of our love and relationship. Filhaal hum dost hi rahein tho behter hai. Let's just be friends for now. I don't want the baggage of my past ruin our present Armaan. I need to do this Armaan…..for us…..for myself."

"Riddhima….kya saath rehne se dosti kum ho jaayegi kya?" He asked impatiently.

'Nahin…darr hai ki kahin pyaar aur zyaada gehra na ho jaaye aur humein kamzor banaa de," she looked away.

"Riddhima….where will you go?" He pulled her back into his arms, "I can't let you out alone in this world."

"Armaan…..I need you to be my strength, not my crutch."

"Riddhima lekin… will you manage all alone?"

"I will. I have to. This is my fight, my mess. Tum hi tho kehte ho, stay away from my mess," she smiled tearfully, "let me deal with it my way….please Armaan don't stop me."

"Kahan jaa rahi ho?" His voice cracked.

"Asha Women's Hostel."

"Can I see you there?" His eyes welled up with tears.

"Yes of course…..but not in my room," she smiled, "in the lobby-yes." She peeled herself away from his embrace.

"Why are you doing this to yourself Riddhima?" He pulled her back into his arms, stared at her beautiful face, he sighed with disappointedly, "I understand Riddhima. Shayad main tumhari jagah hota tho main bhi yahi karta."

"Thanks for understanding Armaan," she touched his cheek, planting a kiss on it.

"Jaane se pehle, kya main in honthon ko hamesha ke liye apna banaa sakta hoon?" He asked softly, his fingers tracing the outlines of her lips. A throbbing pulse in her neck, flushed face, parched lips and a sweet tingle within, craved for his lips, but before he could bend down, she placed her fingers on them, "yeh tumhari amaanat hain ab, bas kuch din mere paas rehne do inhein."

He kissed her fingers resting on his lips, "I will miss you Riddhima."

"Me too."

"Itni door kyun jaa rahi ho?" He protested once again.

"Paas aane ke liye," she kissed his hand, "please go to the academy with your music. I don't want you to be here when I leave."

Sighing, he shook his head, "bahut ziddi ho…..can I drop you to the hostel?"

"I will take a taxi Armaan. Please don't make it difficult for me," she ran to her room and quickly packed her bags. Armaan refused to go to the music academy while she was still there, "agar tum ziddi ho, tho main bhi ziddi hoon."

As she exited the apartment, he caught her by her waist and pulled her into his arms once again, "don't go……kaise rahoonga tumhare bina?"

"I promise, we will talk every day."

"Aur main roz shaam ko tumse milne aaunga….in the lobby!" He cringed, "and not the room."

After a prolonged embrace, they bid adieu with heavy hearts but dream and hope in their eyes. She blew a kiss at him as she boarded the taxi.

"Why does true love always test us?" Armaan sighed, punching his chest in vain, "I love you Riddhima," he blew a kiss back and gazed at the sun peeking through the clouds, "maybe there is a God somewhere out there……take care of my Riddhima, will you?"

"tere bin kahan humse'

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

zidd chhod di lo aaj keh diya

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

zindagi bhaag kar hum se aage chali

thaam lo na hamein chaand taaron tale


zindagi bhaag kar hum se aage chali

thaam lo na hamein chaand taaron tale

tod daali tanhaayi hai

ab mohabbat rut aayi hai

zidd chhod di lo aaj keh diya

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

jaane kitne baras dhoop mein main chala

tum mile jis ghadi jaise baadal mila


jaane kitne baras dhoop mein main chala

tum mile jis ghadi jaise baadal mila

barso na toot ke zara

bheeg jaaye man ye baawra

zidd chhod di lo aaj keh diya

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

barso na toot ke zara

bheeg jaaye man ye baawra

zidd chhod di lo aaj keh diya

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega

tere bin kahan hum se jiya jaayega


"Abhimanyu jee….ek bahut badhi khabar hai mere paas."

"Oh Shailendra? What do you want from me now?" An angry Abhimanyu answered the phone

"Nothing jee…nothing….I just want you to be happy…..jaante ho wo Armaan abhi India mein hi hai!"

"What? I heard he left for the US." Abhimanyu was stunned.

"Nahin jee…..he is very much at the music academy….and to top it all, your wife, my slutty sister in law, Riddhima, is living with him!"

………….to be contd……….


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