Wednesday, 22 July 2020

Epilogue : Dill Ki Baat

Opening her eyes Ridz looked around at the alien surroundings "mein kaha hu" she wondered as she tried to lift her hand to her head, the pain of trying to focus on the objects surrounding her was making her head hurt and desperately needed supporting... "mere haath ko kya hua'why cant I move it?" she panicked as her left arm felt immensly heavy and stopped her from lifting it, the worst possible thoughts came into her head, "Ridz tu pagal hogeyi hai kya?" the voice of reason spoke' "pehle dekh toh sahi kaha hai tere haath?"' dreading to find the real reason as to why she was unable to move Ridz slowly turned her head to the left and almost instantly froze at the sight in front of her'



"Wohi sapna, phir se" she whispered to herself, as the figure in front of her came into focus. There looking like god's greatest creation to man kind was her Greek god Armaan, sleeping like a baby holding her hand possessivly. Raising her hand as she had done several times in this dream before to caress his face, to touch her reason for existing half expecting him to disappear, a thought popped into her head making her stop in her tracks,  "don't touch him, woh chala jayega, don't do it". Ridz hand stopped inches away from his face' "nahi he cant leave me today, mein phir se yeh judai nahi seh sakungi" tears of pain made their way down her cheeks as she reflected on the patheticness of her situation, here she was trying to hold onto a dream when the truth was Armaan wanted nothing to do with her' he was bored of her' the bitter words of Armaan from that evening rang in her head' that evening when Armaan had broken her completely.

***FLASHBACK***

Confused at the sudden change of events Ridz went to the bar/lounge with Raj, trying to get a hold of Armaan all day had tired her out, but on Raj's insistance she agreed to go to with him for a few quiet drinks. Entering the bar Ridz smiled at Raj as she counted her lucky stars for having such a caring friend who was always there to cheer her up when she felt let down by others.

A few drinks later Ridz had almost forgotten all her earlier worries laughing at Raj's numerous stories that never failed to amuse her.

Raj: "Riddy I love this song, fancy a dance?" looking at his hand in front of her face Ridz hesitated for a moment, she was supposed to be upset but Raj had done so much to lighten her mood, the least she could do is dance with her childhood best friend. Smiling in approval Ridz took Raj's hand and made her way to the dance floor. Swaying to the music with Raj, Ridz broke down as she remembered her first dance with Armaan.

Raj: "hey Riddy kya hua' mein itna bura dancer hu kya?" raising her head Ridz laughed at Raj's comment, but the tears had already started. Feeling Raj wipe away her tears Ridz closed her eyes as a smile played on her lips

Ridz: "Sorry" she whispered opening her eyes'

Raj: "uff Riddy mein kitni bar kaho tummhe, humare beech yeh sorry lavz ajeeb laghta hai, please don't use it"

Smiling at her sweet friend Ridz hugged him "thank you"

Affectionately hugging her back "thank you goes into the same category so don't use it either".

Laughing a little Ridz departed from the hug, the laughter was short lived, their standing not too far from them was Armaan' but he wasn't alone'

Armaan was dancing with some leggy, mini skirt wearing witch' who was practically eating Armaan's face! The volcano in her had errupted as Ridz pushed Raj out of the way storming over to Armaan and the churail.

Ridz went to grab the churail's hair when her hand was stopped midariby none other then Armaan, standing astonished at his actions she watched him finish kissing the churail as he held onto Ridz hannd. Dumbstruck Ridz stared as the horrible nightmare continued in front of very own eyes. 

Departing from the kiss Armaan looked up at Ridz with a lipstick covered smirk on his face, "hi honey, meine tumhe dekha nahi, did you want something?" letting go of Ridz hand he took a hold of the churail by her waist smiling innocently at Ridz,

Ridz: "A.. Arm.." unable to get the words out she just stood there looking from the churail back at Armaan with tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

Churail: "Babes, yeh kaun hai" she mumbled in Armaan's ear as she kissed it pulling away at the end, loud enough for it not to miss Ridz attention

Armaan: "Oh sweety, meine toh introduction karna bhool hi geya ta' meet Riddima Gupta, my finace, aur Ridz this is Stella, meri kaas dost"

Stella: "Hi Rid.. Ridd' whatever, hi" smiling she wiped the lipstick off Armaans' lips at which Armaan tried to bite her fingers.

Turning away disgusted Ridz started to walk away when Armaan held her wrist again to stop her.

Armaan: "Basket you know kaas dost jaise tum aur Raj" winking at Raj who was now approaching the little group

Turning back shocked Ridz anger flew out of the window as she pulled her arm away, "Raj aur mein sirf dost hai, samjhe" she hissed as the poison spread with her words

Armaan: "Aww honey don't get upset with me, humare shaadi hone walle hai' I know what you need, come here" he grabbed Ridz and tried to force her to kiss him. Ridz completely flipped and slapped Armaan across the face with all her force drawing blood from his lips.

Sucking the blood Armaan looked at Ridz amused, "this was the best you could do?" he raised an eyebrow at her, "Whatever, I was bored of you anyways sweetheart, Stella's definately a better kisser then you, and Im sure in other ways too" winking at Ridz one last time Armaan wrapped his arms around Stella's waist, holding her close and walked out of the bar snuggling up to her.

***END FLASHBACK***

Ridz cried as she remembered leaving her engagement ring on the bedside draw with her note to her parents that night saying she didn't want to marry Armaan, escaping from that god foresaken city in the dead of night.

Opening her eyes Ridz woke up from what she thought was a dream, expecting to see the same colourless walls of the hotel room that had been her escape or rather prison for weeks' she was a prisoner of her own thoughts and feelings. Seeing the same alien surroundings around her Ridz head shot to the left expecting to see Armaan there sleeping holding her hand. Seeing he wasn't Ridz tried to sit up in bed to work out whats going on, where was she? what happened? Who bought me here? Ridz panicked trying to jump out of bed and run away from there when dizziness took control of her and she almost fell back on the bed

Armaan: "Arre pagal hogeye ho kya? What do you think your doing, get back into bed now" Ridz looked at Armaan taking a hold of her by her hand and helping her back into bed. "What is going on" she wondered, am I still dreaming?" pinching herself lightly Ridz gasped as the pain kicked in the realisation this wasn't a dream

Ridz: "Armaan" she whispered still trying to convince herself this was real

Armaan: "shhh, no talking, tum abhi iss waqt kuch maat kaho' please" he added on with a whisper, not wanting to let his emotions get in the way of her recovery.

Feeding her soup with his hands Armaan noticed how pale and thin Ridz looked, she looked like such a delicate flower whom he had broken' but why' she was with the man she loved now, she should have been happy, then why was had he found in such a dire state. Remembering carrying her to his hotel room last night Armaan noticed how deathly she looked, his first thoughts were someone attacked her, but after further basic tests he found she had literally starved herself, she hadnt eaten in atleast 3 days, but from looking at her it was obvious it was more then that.

Armaan's hand started to shake with anger as he imagined his frail Ridz lying on the beach all by herself when the man she loved Raj was nowhere to be found' what was she doing on the beach by herself, where is Raj now' all the questions simply added to the anger at Raj and frustation of not being able to do anything about it.

Noticing his hands shake Ridz took the courage to look up at Armaan for the first since he ushered back into bed. Staring at him seething with anger Ridz froze, "has he had enough of me again? Is he going to kick me out of his life again and shatter me" the raw emotions of being rejected came flooding back as she saw the anger in Armaan's eyes.

Ridz: "Armaan, insaniyat ki naate you don't have to be do this, I know you're a doctor and this is your duty, but really this isnt necessary' if the sight of me angers you so much I'll leave"

Staring at her in disbelief Armaan couldn't believe what he just heard' insaniyat' doctors duty' is that all she thought of his love for her.

Watching her get out of bed and make her way towards the door Armaan grabbed her wrist "Yeh insaniyat nahi ta' this was my genuine concern and care for you"

Ridz turned around with tears in her eyes, the emotions had gotten too much for her so she had to leave, as Armaan stopped her, the yearning for him came back and the tears automatically started flowing

Ridz: "Armaan you don't mean that' please let me go, mein phir se aapne dil ko tootne nahi desakhti' Im not strong enough' please" taking her hand out of his hold Ridz left his room and headed for hers.

Unable to understand what was happening Armaan was about to follow her out when his mobile started ringing on the side table, answering the call Armaans' confusion increased' "Krishna" he whispered

**********************************************

Sitting in the beach facing caf Armaan was restraining himself from killing Raj' he had just spent the past 3 hours sitting listening to Raj and Krishna go on about the whole misunderstanding and conspiracy raj had out together

 "Doctors cant be murderers' he is not worth prison" Armaan tried to calm himself down, "What the hell, iss Raj ne mera poora zindagi barbaad kardiya hai, mere Ridz ko poori tarah tor diya hai, woh marsakhti ti jiss haal mein ti aur kissi ko pata bhi nahi chalta and your saying this isnt worth murder!?!" seething with fury Armaan gulped down his piping hot coffee, the pain the burning drink gave him was nothing compared to what he had done to Ridz.

Armaan started as calmly as possible "Krishna, tumhara matlab hai Raj ne joh kuch bhi kiya woh sab uski personal insecurity ki wajah se ta' he made me die a hundred deaths every second because he wasn't sure how to deal loosing his links to his childhood' you mean to say Ridz has been starving herself nearly killing herself, because Raj didn't know if he loved her or not' you mean to tell me that mere Ridz ghar, career, parivaar hell everything she ever loved.. she left it all behind because this little rat couldn't decide what the hell he wanted! Aur abh jab usse pata challa ki woh basket se pyar nahi karta or rather basket kabhi usse uss nazar se nahi dekhi ti you want her to try and get back everything she's lost, everything I've lost!" ending almost shouting at Raj more then Krishna Armaan slammed his fist down on the table making the entire caf fall silent and stare at the commotion.

Not caring about the surroundings or the spectacle he was making of himself Armaan literally jumped up in his seat and grabbed Raj by the collar before he got a chance to dusk out of the way,

Armaan: "And you, you little piece of crap! Gutless, spineless $%!@' tum jaise dost se behtar kissi dushmanne agar zeher de deta toh basket zyada kush naseeb hoti! Atleast she'd know where she stood!" pushing Raj out of his grasp Raj lost his balance and tripped over his chair landing on the floor' storming off from there Armaan went to find his basket' there was so much to say, so much to do' but how

Krishna who knew exactly what Armaan was feeling stayed quiet the entire time, she knew just like Armaan needed to get physically violent to get over what Raj had done' but she was surprised Raj got off so lightly. Not giving it much thought she told Raj to go home while she followed Armaan to sort out this mess' but first she needed to make a call.

*************************************

"Just find her and talk to her'. Par woh meri baat sunegi nahi' arre yaar baat karke toh dekh, woh abhi bhi tujhse utna pyar karti hai jitna tu usse' what if she says she wants nothing to do with me, it'll all be my fault' it is your fault why the hell didn't you talk to her before jumping to conclusions' it wasn't my fault its all that $%?@&*# Raj's fault' he played a part in it, you are ultimately to blame, passing the buck wont bring her back, you have to do something yourself"Armaan argued with himself continuously wakling blinding along the beach looking for Ridz, the thought of lost her because of his own stupidity killed him,

Krishna: "apne aao ko kaus na bandh karo Armaan, it wasn't your fault"

Armaan jumped as Krishna came up behind him and interrupted his line of thinking.

Armaan: "Thanks Krishna, par yeh meri hi galati ti' aur kissi ka nahi" kicking the sand with his feet Armaan kept walking along the beach trying to clear his head and build up the courage to face Ridz. The fact that his entire family was there with him completely escaped his memeory

Krishna: "Armaan aaj tumahri shaadiki mohrat hai' yaad hai na"

Armaan looked up at Krishna amazed, what was she on about' "Krishna yeh tum' kal koi shaadi nahi hai" he looked away feeling depressed and continued walking away

Krishna took a hold of Armaans arm and forced him to sit down in the beach to stop from walking away. "Armaan why doyou think your entire family is in Goa in winter' its hardly holiday season right?... socho bhudu socho' tummhe yaha laya geya hai' Ridz ko milna yeh humne nahi par upar wala ne milaya hai' come on I know all this sounds filmy but sometimes life can be that way' you and Ridz belong together for gods sake"

Armaan stared at Krishna lost, "Why is she telling me all of this, does she want to add to my pain, me and Ridz can now never be together and its all my own doing"

Seeing Armaan lost in his thoughts Krishna got furious, here she was trying to make everything better for her friend who she loved more then a sister and here was this overgrown cry babay who seemed lost, maybe he don't deserve to be with Ridz' Krishna immediately shooed the thought away, she had never seen Ridzy as happy as she was with Armaan in her life.

Clicking her finger in front of Armaans faceto bring him back to reality "Armaan' kaha ko geye' mein kuch kehrehi hu"

Armaan: "Sorry Krishna, par mujhe nahi laghta Ridz mere baat sunegi, meine hi usse humesha kiliye doorh kardiya ta uspar shack karke, I don't think she'll ever come back so please can we drop this subject. Maybe god did bring me here to learn the truth though, so I could punish myself and not live the fake illusion that Ridz was happy with Raj'" before Armaan could continue Krishna's hands were around Armaan's neck

Krishna: "What the hell is wrong with you god damit!" immediately her hands back Krishna tried to calm herself down. Afte taking dramatic deep breaths Krishna looked up at Armaan who was sitting there looking amused more then anything

Krishna: "What are you laughing at" her hands were ready to strangle him again

Armaan: "Hey hey chill, I just found out where basket got her temprement from" laughing a little Armaan remembered the various times Ridz anger had flown out of the window before melting almost instantly.

Before Armaan could start his feel sorry for me saga agaon Krishna took a hold of his hand and dragged him over to what look like derelict rocks not to far from the beach

Armaan: "Krishna your married, and' and I love Ridz what are you doing?" confused by Krishna's actions this was the first thing that popped into Armaans head.

Krishna: "Exactly! you love Ridz' aur yehi toh mein kehrehi hu' she loves you just as much back so why on earth are yo ubeing so awkward for' you're getting married this evening all the preparations have been done now it's down to you to go and make Ridz agree' yeh kaam bhi mein nahi karsakhtti abh jao" Krishna pushed Armaan between the rocks and pointed at a figure standing at the far side of the rocks'

Armaan stared in amazement at what Krishna was pointing at, there standing in the cool breeze was Ridz with her arms wrapped around her looking like heavenly, hair flying wildly dancing with the waves crashing on the rocks, he just couldn't see her face properly because the hair was as always obscuring his vision. Looking back at Krishna to ask yet more questions Armaan found her nowhere to be found,

Ridz sensed Armaan walking towards her, burning her with his gaze but she refused to acknowledge him. She knew he also remembered today was supposed to be the day they finally could start a new phase of their lives as husband and wife, but who would have thought the cruel twist of fate would have changed their course and here they were at a new phase in life but not together, separate'

Armaan: "Is this space taken" whispering Armaan tried to bring Ridz back to reality, as he stood next to her

Unsure of what he was up to, why he was their teasing her with his presence Ridz silently turned away to walk away from him, she still hadn't managed to control her feelings/emotions as easily as Armaan obviously had' standing next to him on these rocks was definitely not a good idea, if he taunted her again then the water always looked welcoming.

Clutching her hand from behind Armaan walked closer behind her not wanting to let her go

Ridz: "mere haat chor dijiye please"

The icy words carefully selected to address him as a stranger stung his already deep wounds, but he wasn't about to let her go away again

Armaan: "Nahi chorunga, kya kar loge" whispering in her ear Armaan let his lips kiss her earlobe before moving away. Feel Ridz gasp Armaan knew it was true, she still loved him. Elated Armaan found the confidence he was lacking till know to get his Ridz back' his Ridz, smiling at the feeling of getting Ridz back Armaan closed his eyes as he let her hair get blown by the wind onto his face, englufing his every sense with her essence.

Not ready to let herself be taken for a ride again Ridz forcefully pulled her hand away from Armaan and created space between them, with tears now running down her face, the pain turned into anger as she felt herself go weak from his touch' "Doorh raho mujhse Armaan, I want nothing to do with you' ever"

Feeling the icy wall take up its position between them again Armaan stood frozen to the spot, had he misjudged her reactions a few minutes ago? Moving closer to her Armaan this time made sure he didn't make the mistake of trying to force her, "Can we talk please?"

Ridz: "abh kehne kilye bacha kya hai?"



Armaan: "mujhe maaro, koso, kuch bhi par please aek baar bhaat toh karo' im going mad without you' I' I can't live without you" watching her standing their as icy as ever Armaan felt the desperation come to a limit within "Atleast give me a chance to explain"



Seeing Ridz slowly walk towards the edge of the rocks Armaan was about to rush forward and grab her to stop her thinking she was going to jump, but then stopped seeing her sit down on the edges, almost waiting for him to start his explanations.



Standing in his spot Armaan took a deep breath and started narrating the story from his side and how Rahul had managed to trick him into believing there was something going on between the two'



The sun was setting by the time Armaan finished his explanation, he had been carefully watching Ridz and her reactions to see if there was any hope left in their relationship, but the entire time she had remained expressionless and quiet' finally breaking her silence she started barely above a whisper " tumne bina pooche, bina soche kya ko kya banadiya' aek baar mujhse poocha hota ki mere aur Raj ki beech kya hai, yah phir kehdete ki tummhe mere dost pasand nahi hai' mein bina koi sawal karhe usse chor deta' kyun ki mujhe tum par itna vishwas hai' nahi ta' abh'." Leaving her words lingering Ridz looked away as she felt her words crush Armaan' as much they hurt her too she had to say them. Getting up from her seat Ridz put her sandals back on and started making her way back towards the hotel' the beach was pretty deserted now, not many people visited this beach of Goa in the winter aparently



"Please aisa maath kaho' I was a stupid fool' I guess I was insecure about our relationship' I was getting everything in life and I guess I just couldn't accept it all for what it was' mein' mein Raj se jealous ta" taking a hold of her hands Armaan turned Ridz to face him, her eyes were closed as tears matching his ran down her cheeks



Opening her eyes, eyes full of anger and fury Ridz tore Armaan to pieces by pulling her hands away harshy as she poked his chest with her accusing finger "Jealous! Jealous.. Don't you dare try and get out of this by putting such a small word to your betrayal! You betrayed me, my love, my trust' have you any idea what ive been through!" sobbing hysterically Ridz refused to let Armaan touch her' she needed to say this, get this off her chest otherwise these bitter words would always stay there' for the first time in weeks she realised that the failure of their relationship was not down to her solely' Armaan was equally to blame and now he too would have to feel all the pain she had suffered over the past few weeks.



Ridz: "Tumhare waje se meine kissi ko bina kuch kahe, bina koi vaje dekar ghar se, apne parents, behen, dosto, career' sab kuch chor kar ayi' kabhi kissi ko bataya bhi nahi ki mein kyun yeh shaadi nahi karsakhti" pushing him back with all her might she watched Armaan stumble backwards a little before regaining his balance "do you want to know the reason why I didn't tell anyone the reason for the break up of this relationship' do you? Its because even then after you told me that you were bored of me' I still loved you, I actually stupidly felt the reason for you falling out of love with me was because there was something wrong, something lacking in me' but you" shoving him again "you were too busy jumping to conclusions' you never once had faith in my love' oh sod my love, your love? What kind of man are you, your weak spineless buzdil man, you don't know how to trust, you don't know how to talk things over'you' you' mujhe aise jeewan saati nahi chahiye" saying this she walked away again leaving a completely broken man' just as she was about to walk past him she stopped and turned her head towards him "Thank you for your explanation Dr Armaan Malik, now I can forget the wasted moments in my life with you and move on in life" tears still running down her cheeks Ridz walked away



Hearing a splash behind her Ridz froze on the spot' had he' had he just' "Armaan" whispering his name as she turned around Ridz stared in disbelief as she found Armaan on both knees crying silently with his hands in a prayer position covering his face



Melting seeing him looking like a broken child all her earlier anguish and fury disappeared, no matter how much she denied it she loved him and there was nothing he nor her could do about it' hearing another splash Ridz saw the waves now crashing against the rocks making the very noise that had her made her turn.



Kneeling down in front of him Ridz gently took Armaans hands into hers and kissed the top of them "I'm sorry' kuch zyada hi kehdia na"



Opening his eyes Armaan stared back at her with his red puffy tearful eyes, "Sorry toh mujhe kehna chahiye' it's all'" feeling her finger on his lips he stopped talking



Ridz: "Galati hum dono ki ta' I should have known what you were feeling"



Leaning his forehead on hers Armaan whispered "because you're a mind reader na" hearing her laugh even through her tears bought a smile to his lips, how he had craved to hear that laughter



Armaan: "I promise you I will never be a jerk ever again, never again will I let my insecurities get in the way of you and me' bas aek baar mujhe maaf kardo please"



Ridz: "agar meine maaf na kiya hota toh kya mein aise yaha hoti pagal". FeelingArmaan move his head back Ridz opened her eyes to see him staring loving into hers "Kya hua?"



Armaan: "Riddhima Gupta, kya tum iss pagal ki saath zindagi bar rahoge? will you marry me?"



Nodding her head slightly Ridz smiled as she poked Armaan on his cheek to show his dimple through his tears'



Not being able to hold back any longer Armaan kissed Ridz gently on her lips before lifting her in his storng arms and carrying her back towards the hotel.



*********************************************



Waking up feeling his hands wrapped around her holding her possessively under the sheets Ridz blushed as she remembered their night together. It felt strange but right at the same time, up until yesterday she was just Riddhima Gupta, and this morning she had officially become Mrs Riddhima Armaan Malik.



Feeling his hands slowly make their way down her upper thigh under the covers Ridz again started to feel the sweet sensation from within "Armaan sonne do na' ive only had 3 hours sleep" she whispered trying to pull away from his slightly



Armaan: "And that's my fault' you were the one who got carried away, now its my turn for payback" he whispered in her ear as he pulled her closer trapping her body under his strong hold



Staring into Armaans eyes Ridz found her self sinking again, drifting away, succumbing to their desires Armaan and Ridz passionately possessed each other again as the morning sun blessed them with a new day in their lives.



The End

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